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Pranksgiving

Posted by on Friday, December 19, 2014 in College Life.

*Guest blog by Dave Bruns, a dear friend and fellow senior at Vanderbilt with mischievous tendencies. Here’s a story about one of his recent pranks gone wrong.

There is nothing I love more than a good prank. The look on someone’s face when you fill their shoes with catfish bait or fill their bed with your hair clippings is priceless (Editor’s note: EW). But there is more to pranking than that. Pulling a good prank is truly a work of art. It takes hard work and a special eye to be a good prankster. And while seeing the aftermath of the prank is always satisfying, the best part is the planning that goes into it. For a brief time, you get to step into the socks of an evil genius and wreak havoc. However, sometimes things don’t  go according to plan.

We had just returned from Thanksgiving Break and were cheering on the Commodores in my final football game as a Vanderbilt student. Fellow blogger, Ann, stayed in town for break and had borrowed our friend Monica’s car. Now, you have to understand that Ann is violently ticklish. A stiff wind will send her into such a giggle fit that you’d think she was dying. So, naturally, my buddy Hunter and I took it upon ourselves to tickle her. In her uncontrollable convulsions, she lost Monica’s key. We snatched it up, recognizing this as a wonderful opportunity to guarantee ourselves a spot in the Pranking Hall of Fame. Unfortunately, Monica soon discovered that we had her key and demanded it back. It appeared as if our grand master prank plan was over before it started.

But wait! In a brilliant stroke of genius, he had given Monica the key to his own car (all Volkswagen keys are identical, and they both happen to have Volkswagens). We were in the clear. Reveling in our glorious feat of grand theft auto, we took a joy ride to Target. We had some big makeover plans for her car.

On our way to Target we bounced a few ideas around as to what we might do to her car. Hiding a dead fish in the glove compartment was on the list, but that would be a bit messy. We settled on some pretty standard stuff: window paint and balloons. Unfortunately, they don’t sell window paint at Target, so we grabbed a bar of soap instead (which works quite well as window paint, by the way). We also got some extra fine gold glitter to add that final fabulous touch. We headed back to Vandy and began filling balloons and creating works of art to rival the Sistine Chapel on the windows and doors. After 30 minutes and 72 balloons, we were done. As the cherry on top, we dumped that extra fine glitter all over the seats, the dashboard, the floor, and the cup holders. No part of the interior was left un-glamorized. That Volkswagen Tiguan shone like a jewel.

The result of our shenanigans.

As you can imagine, Monica was not pleased. The next day, after threatening to make us pay for a professional cleaning, we begrudgingly agreed to clean it ourselves. How hard could it possibly be? All we had to do was take it through a car wash, pop some balloons, and vacuum up some glitter, right?

Wrong. The balloons and soap were pretty easy cleans, but glitter is another beast. It is actually impossible to get out. Why did we think glitter was a good idea? The glitter somehow managed to lodge itself inseparably into the upholstery. Despite our best efforts, the glitter simply would not come out. And to make matters worse, I somehow managed to break her sunroof. (Don’t ask, because I don’t really know how it happened; it all happened so fast.) Anyway, that glitter is now part of that car’s very soul. But on the bright side (pun intended), her car now looks more fabulous that ever!

Our masterpiece.

The whole point of a prank is to inconvenience someone. And we did. It’s just that we inconvenienced ourselves in the process. What we thought would be an incredible prank turned out to be a pretty unpleasant experience for Hunter and me.

But inconvenience aside, this brilliant prank gone awry will make for a college memory I am not likely to forget. Vanderbilt is a place where you are surrounded by people who are always willing to have fun and do crazy things with you. I love that I go to a school where I am close enough to my friends to pull grand pranks on them.

Next time I’ll just be sure to leave glitter out of the equation.

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